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hello from the hospital as some of you
may know I am taking a social media
break at the moment so my Instagram my
Tik Tok they're all deactivated at the
moment and that's that's a separate
video that I will share why I chose to
do that but I planned on making a video
this week on my channel just kind of
giving a life update and just just
checking with you guys cuz it's been a
while since I posted a
video but life had different plans and I
ended up in the hospital it's really
cold in this room oh my gosh
I Woke
Up 3 days
ago and the left side of my
body was numb
from my upper back to my feet
thought that's really weird I must have
slept on it wrong cuz sometimes when I
lay on my body at a certain position
I'll wake up and my body will feel like
it's asleep and that's what this feels
like it feels like it's
asleep I didn't really I I wasn't
concerned about it I spent the day with
my family I didn't ever even said
anything to them because I thought it
was just like this temporary thing that
would go away um and it didn't seem like
a big deal at the time but I did tell my
boyfriend if it's like this in a couple
days I'll probably
just go to you know the doctor and see
what's going
on well the next
day I woke up and my whole like saddle
region is numb I was like oh um well
this can't be
normal this is probably a cause for
concern so I looked it up and I found
this one condition that I thought it
could be um which is called
Kina which is basically like the nerves
in your lower back it looks like a
horse's tail and it goes to your legs so
if something's wrong with that area they
have to do like surgery so I was kind of
mentally preparing for that to be the
case but I came in did my first MRI it
came back
inconclusive and they told me that I did
not have that but because I was numb it
was a cause for concern so they said we
need to keep you
overnight and do a couple more MRIs um
four more to be exact we got to do your
brain we got to do your upper neck we
got to do the rest of your back because
we need to figure out what's going on
this isn't normal that night which was
last night I had an MRI it was supposed
to be a 2hour long MRI and if you've
ever had an MRI
before it's very hard to hold still the
first Samurai I did was only like 15
minutes so this was definit defitely a
drastic difference from that I tried to
power through but at about an hour and
10 minutes in I had to tap out because
my entire body was and pain it was the
craziest pain I'd ever felt like every
part of my body was just so tense so
they said okay we'll continue
tomorrow had to wait all day but finally
got an
MRI about 4 hours ago and this one was
about 45 minutes
but right after I got my MRI done I got
results immediately they were kind of
throwing around the
idea yesterday and so I feel like I've
kind of
already processed in some ways that this
would be the
case
uh but I've been diagnosed with Ms
multiple
sclerosis yeah I'm taking you guys
through this with me in real time
because
I like I said I'm still processing this
and it's just been a lot of information
it's hit me with like a ton of bricks
and I'm coming to
terms with the fact that this is my new
reality the nurses here have been
incredible and so empathetic
and
uh sat down with me and
just made me feel really seen and heard
and uh
I'm encouraged
that I'll still be able to live a normal
life even with this disease
um I don't know the extent of my disease
personally because I meet with a
neurologist in the
morning so um
I mean I'm hoping for good
news I'm hoping
that that mine's going to be something
that's going to be really
manageable
um it's interesting how everyone's
symptoms are so different and how it
affects each person so differently
because when I from what I know about Ms
personally is that it affects your
vision um the people that I know that
have MS like went blinded you know or
like lost Vision all of a sudden and
that's how they were
diagnosed um there's not a whole lot of
stories that I've read or looked into
that have started where I started which
is with the numbness in the legs I do
think Christina Abate had like numbness
in her toes and that was her first
line but most of the time I feel like it
really affects your eyesight because
there's like lesions in the brain so
when they did my brain scan that's how
they found out that I have it but I also
have it on my spine so I don't know what
that means I don't know exactly
like what my life is going to look like
moving forward
um but I suspect that I will find all of
that information out tomorrow so if I
seem really calm right
now just know I cried a lot last night
because my MRI tech kind of gave it to
me gave it to me straight and told me
that they were suspecting that I had had
Ms so I was kind of able to process it
last night um in some ways and just kind
of had a hard time sleeping cuz I was so
worried about it so now that I know I do
have
it uh it's kind of like okay well let's
figure out a plan to move forward
because life goes on I'm still a single
mom I'm a
caretaker and uh you know I still got to
take care of everyone else on top of
taking care of myself and I'm not very
good at taking care of myself to be 100%
honest with you so um this seems like
it's going to be kind of complicated but
there's no better time to learn to take
care of
yourself like being hit with a
autoimmune disorder
disease so um yeah that's my life right
now and that's what I'm going through
I'm I'm sure there's some of you
watching this video right now who have
MS yourself so
um I guess I'm in the club I guess
that's my update right now I will let
you guys know what I find out in the
morning
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