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Going to a show has many more dimensions
than just the bands playing. It's a
social gathering. Additionally, the
venue might allow re-entry and the bar
sells a great iced coffee. You might
even remember being stuck in traffic on
the way to a gig or getting pulled over
on the way back from one. I've been to a
lot of shows. Quite often, I'll talk to
people about a band that came through
and I'll hear, "I wanted to go to that,
but I didn't have anyone to go with me."
That's a common reason people might not
go to shows, and I'm going to tell you
why you should go anyway. Showing up by
yourself means it's 100% on your terms.
You decide what time to leave. You
decide how you're getting there. You
decide if you want to stay afterwards
and try to get autographs. You decide
where you want to eat. And you don't
have to worry about matching outfits if
that's your thing. If you want to see
the opening bands, you won't have to
hear anyone say, "Well, why don't we
just show up fashionably late and just
see the
headliners. Also, you won't have to
potentially leave early because your
friend gets tired and has to work early
the next day." If you feel like going
somewhere before the show, you don't
have to ask anybody's permission. Just
go. There's the concept of self-reliance
and not being so dependent on other
people to enjoy things. The best types
of people to go to concerts with are
punctual people. They're rare, but they
exist, and they're the greatest. They'll
be ready at the time you agreed upon.
They'll pitch in gas money if that's how
you roll, and you'll have someone to
talk to on the way home. Shows can be
shared moments for these reasons. But
then you get the other kind of people.
You show up to their place at the set
time and they hadn't even showered yet.
They want to stop at a million places on
the way to the venue. They claim they're
too broke to pitch in for gas money, but
then they buy a bunch of beers at the
show.
that can really dampen your experience
of what would otherwise be a splendid
time. It's not even that they're bad
people necessarily, they're just
unreliable. I've had my share with both
types, and I much prefer the considerate
ones, but I want to lean into the social
aspect of it. Going to a show by
yourself shouldn't be seen as this
depressing thing that happens only
because you can't find anyone to go
with. Quite the contrary, I would even
argue that doing this on purpose could
open up a lot of possibilities. Your
attention isn't focused on whoever you
might have brought with you. So, why not
start a conversation with the person in
line next to you? Dialoguing with a real
human being can be a lot more satisfying
than playing on your phone and possibly
having your dopamine drained. Even at
the merch booth, sometimes it can take
20 to 30 minutes before you can finally
get your stuff. The person behind you
might could help you pick what shirt you
want. And while they're at it, they
might even tell you about their other
interests and how many times they've
seen the band. What else happens is when
you go to the same type of shows often
enough, you'll start seeing the same
faces over and over. That's an
icebreaker. Hey, I saw you last week.
You didn't go to the show with friends,
but you can make new friends at the
show. Obviously, you can do this with
your crew around you, too. But I'm
suggesting this so you can get more out
of your concert
experience. But what if you don't want
to be social? That works, too. Being at
the show by yourself means that you can
be in your element with less
distractions. You don't have to answer
to anybody. You can just focus on the
music and enjoy yourself. There's
comfort in knowing that everyone in the
room is there for the same reason, the
love of the music. Then there's the show
itself. If live music is something you
enjoy, you don't want to miss what could
be a lot of fun. For a great live band,
the songs come to life when played
loudly for an audience. Sometimes you
have the unique presentation of the band
changing up the set list or bringing
guest musicians on stage with them, but
even on a regular night, you could still
have a great time watching them work.
Sure, there's the thought of, "Man, I
wish so and so were here to see this."
But that just gives you more to remember
and play back for later. Whether your
friend goes to the show with you or not
has nothing to do with how the band
plays. The party starts when you get
there, and you're there to partake for
those who can't, if you'd like to frame
it that way. What about the
collectibles? Catching guitar picks, set
lists, and drumsticks is always fun.
Collecting ticket subs, taking show
flyers home, meeting band members. You
wouldn't get to do any of that if you
just stayed home. Hearing a rare song
that almost never gets played on tour.
Oh, you definitely don't want to miss
that. Then there's the tour merch.
Designs that probably won't be available
ever again once the tour is over. If you
want to overload your dresser that
barely shuts as it is, then you
definitely don't need concert companions
for any of that. If you miss shows
simply because you have no one to go
with, you're going to miss out on all
these other memories and potential new
connections and opportunities. It's all
a matter of mindset and making the most
out of the ticket price. There's a lot
of joy out there. The key is to look for
it and if need be to conjure it. Want to
have fun? Make it happen.
Grind on.
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