Music Downloads & Lyrics
I would not have had my two daughters
surgically attached if I knew they were
both gonna be ungrateful pieces of
trash. Now I got to work twice as hard
just to maintain being the good mother I
have been in order for this thing to
survive. Go pee. Being so near your
sister really isn't that bad. At least I
have a witness to everything she does to
us. Mom, we can still feed ourselves.
No. No. Shut the up, darling. This
is what good moms do. I thought I scored
big having a two for one disabled, but
even at the movies, they're still
charging me for two separate seats. Are
you kidding me? They only have one ass.
She's uh my human service person. No.
Damn it. I didn't think this through.
Ma'am, you still need to buy them two
tickets. The hell are you talking about?
My kid is one kid. Well, I recognize her
face, so that means the other one's
under there somewhere. You're being
ableist. Well, oh my god. What? What the
hell did your solder just say?
Do a trick. She makes it really hard to
keep a job. So, that's going to be 8:25.
Oh. Uh, you treat my kids like they are
everyone else. We could have been like
everyone else, but you made us like
this. Not in front of the white
Be honest. Why did you sew us together,
sweetheart? I had no choice. You are
munchousing by proxying us. Ah, I'll
tell you what. The one on the right can
munch this house in by proxy. Why did
you do it? I knew a guy who could do it
for cheap. What? Could do it for cheap?
I don't I feel like you're not
getting it. It doesn't explain why you
did it. I did it because it was a good
deal. I don't like it. You don't like
them. Oh, and it has pronouns.
This is Okay. Oh, you know
what, There is a perfectly good
set of legs in some landfill that wishes
it could be at this table with this
food. I thought this was the landfill.
I'm going to smash your skulls
together. How much was it, Mom? How much
was what? How much was it to sew us
together? Hell of a lot cheaper than two
beds, I'll tell you that.
You are lucky I didn't feed you your
other Ah, you
You don't love me and you don't
get fed till you do. It's come down to
me having to put stickers on their
foreheads so I remember which
one pissed me off that day. I don't want
to hit the wrong one and I always do.
I'm so sorry, baby. I meant to strike
the other one. You're a bad mom. They
like to switch them sometimes, but I
notice. We never switch them. You lying
two-faced Stop staring at my
kids. They're normal. Madam, I am blind.
Yeah. Well, you Yeah, I know what you're
think. You're thinking they sound like a
creature. My god, they are headless. So,
if I smack you, does the other one feel
it? Ah, this is my cash cow, you old
You want to film something? Film
this. Step right up and watch my
daughter bring this mysterious dummy to
life. Help! Our mother is abusing us.
Wow, the magic of
ventriloquism. Which one of you brats
didn't flush the toilet bowl after
taking a
This is my coworker Melanie from my
office job. She's into Netflix and
devild egg recipes. That's still your
kids. Suck our dick. They said our
Abort. Abort. Abort. Oh god. Where are
your lubricants and such? Get out, you
freak. I don't like this circus.
I don't even know which restroom they're
supposed to go in, so I should make them
go in the backyard. You're not allowed
back in till everything comes out. I
just wanted a normal life for my kids.
And everywhere we go, we get stared at
and they're not even looking at me. Hey,
you got a poop bag for that thing? It's
embarrassing. I don't understand why we
both need to be on leashes. Because I'm
a fair mother. You're doing it wrong. I
should have been the dummy. Well, I
mean, you're already acting like the
dummy, you Oh god. Why do you
always Well, it's so real. Hey, that's
no dummy. Those are just run-of-the-mill
conjoined twins aboard. Go, go, go, go.
Yeah. Two becomes one.
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